Feeding the Hungry Heart: The Experience of Compulsive Eating

5 Responses to “Feeding the Hungry Heart: The Experience of Compulsive Eating”

1. Elizabeth Kaplan says:

   May 24, 2010 at 6:39 pm

   Living with an eating-disordered father all my life, it’s no surprise that I ongoing sneaking and hoarding food up in my bedroom by the age of 6. He snuck his binge foods, too, existing on diet Coke, eggbeaters, stout-free cheese, and salads of entire heads of lettuce adorned with additional stout free vegetables and topped with stout-free dressing to take to work– where he’d eat a 2lb. bag of M&M’s in one shift. When I became clinically bulimic at 12, he slowly stopped restocking the pantry and fridge. I was hospitalized on an eating disorders unit twice- first merely because of the bulimia. My mother, at least, was perfect pleased about the 18 extra lbs I’d lost, no matter how dangerously they’d gone. The second time I was admitted to the same unit, I had been riddance every last thing I ate, and spent all of my free time either trying to mimick the detailed exercise charts of “right-life anorexic life tale” OR bingeing and riddance my brains out.

   Finally, 30lbs not more than what would before long become an apparent healthy set weight point, people were getting concerned about my anorexic proclivities. I was to turn 14 years ancient there.

   Brief break before instituationalization. They take no mind of my ED what so ever. I go overboard in the cafeteria. This, plus a lithium prescriptio, puts 42 lbs on me in 4.5 months. I despise myself. I stop eating the moment I am discharged and lose 10 lbs the first week. I do it by baking copiously, and never tasting my goods. I know I am excellent.

   Additional adolescent pursuits of self-destruction manage to whittle me back to a minimum expected weight of 140-145. I never go lower than that. I can stay up for days on LSD, consuming nothing but the occasional nitrous oxide balloon, and later– I will live in my car and travel the country, *permanently* looking for a handout (and extras, to divert to additional street kids). But as a teenager, the only slight possible dip occured when I ongoing enjoying opiates recreationally. It was temporary. Most people get over the weak stomach caused by snorting or shooting dope. I never did, because I now had the perfect take in. No one even *imagined* I might be puking from anything but bulimia. No way. I had my cake and morphine and I could snort and eat and purge it, too.

   But I spent a lot of time in the company of others at this time. I was using drugs, yes. But simply because I spent so much time there, I regularly ate there. And having read some of Geneen’s books by then (this one preobably first- to see where the heck she was coming from) I conceded to order along with the guys (this would be the 3rd manner of language that day) from the place that delivered all the wierd SUBs, like 12inch cheeseburger.

   I would make a sandwich out of whitebread, mayo, and yellow American cheese food product.

   I’d eat a piece of pizza.

   Not yet understanding the right meaning of “crispy” AT ALL, I followed my bosses directions to cram a take-out container full of “crispy chicken” from the Chinese Buffet next door.

   I shared the top layer of the new Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough icecream from B&J’s with the additional girl who haunted the apartment, and learned the joys of “new” Sour Cream and Cheddar Potato Chips.

   So thank you for that, Janeen.

   It wasn’t until I was 2,000 miles and -60 degrees fahrenheit from home, living out of my car with 3 others and a dog that I realized my last eating-disordered vice had slipped away. We were crashing with some nice folks in Colorado Springs, and I was getting some crackers out of the sleeve. I didn’t have the faintest thought how many crackers I was retrieving, whether it was divisible by 3, 6, or what the chart on the side of the box said.
   Reader’s Rating: 5 / 5
2. Anonymous says:

   May 24, 2010 at 9:15 pm

   This book isn’t worth the paper it is written on. The leader is merely trying to “cash in” on the market for informative material about weight loss. I establish no useful information, plans, diets, or insights in this book. The book appears to be simply a narcissistic whine by the leader, a place in which to perfect assassinate the character of her mother and tell supposedly shocking tales about herself, to what purpose I know not. A truly stupid book–and I like 99% of everything I read, so that says a lot. Don’t waste a nickel buying it.
   Reader’s Rating: 1 / 5
3. me says:

   May 24, 2010 at 9:22 pm

   About the only thing I got from this leader is that she suffered from compulsive eating. I agree that you must learn to like yourself, but this woman gives no concrete information on how to do that. I read most of her books about 3 years ago, and even went to one of her seminars. The only thing I learned is that she is rude in person, and the seminar was like one huge ad pushing her additional books. I saw a lot of others there who were struggling with compulsive eating, which was helpful, but we all left feeling like, “now what?”. I finally establish OA, and am experiencing real recovery. This book wasn’t a perfect waste of time, because it sent me into another direction to find a program which really helps me.
   Reader’s Rating: 2 / 5
4. R. Santiago says:

   May 25, 2010 at 12:14 am

   Brilliant book! Make me buy all of Ms. Roth’s additional books. Fantastic insight and a real eye opener to why people overeat and use food for everything except for what its made for: hunger! Thank you for your work!
   Reader’s Rating: 5 / 5
5. 4fabfelines says:

   May 25, 2010 at 1:04 am

   Clear sharp advice from a person who has seen and done it all.
   
   Her experiances are to be learned from and drawn from.
   
   Alot can be learned and applied. She does not tell you what to do or not do, just makes a suggestion.
   
   You are in control or not.
   
   Fantastic book, recommend her additional ones too.
   
   Reader’s Rating: 4 / 5