Beyond Reason: Using Emotions as You Negotiate
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In Getting to Yes, renowned educator and negotiator Roger Fisher open a universally applicable method for effectively negotiating personal and professional disputes. Building on his work as director of the Harvard Negotiation Project, Fisher now teams with Harvard psychologist Daniel Shapiro, an practiced on the emotional dimension of negotiation. In Beyond Reason, they show readers how to use emotions to turn a disagreement-huge or tiny, professional or personal-into an opportunity for mutual gain.Amazon.com Review
Let’s say you’re trying to convince a new employer to sweeten its job offer to you. Or perhaps you’re buying or selling a company. Or maybe you’re even solving for peace in the Middle East. If any of these scenarios is yours, Roger Fisher, Daniel Shapiro, and their colleagues at the Harvard Negotiation Project have thoughts that they want to share. Fisher’s previous book, Getting to Yes, stands today as a seminal work in negotiations theory. Businesspeople in a wide variety of industries have drawn from the book’s tips for deal-building and its larger framework for “interest-based negotiation”, which focuses on understanding each side’s interests and effective together to produce proverbial win-win outcomes. In Beyond Reason, Fisher and Shapiro go one step further.
To the authors’ credit, they ongoing this new book with a clear understanding of the previous one’s chief shortcoming. Though Getting to Yes introduced a powerful paradigm for negotiations, it did not fully take up a critical element of most deals: emotions, and the messy human details that can distract from purely rational choice-building. If both negotiators are consistently lucid, honest, and cool, the game has a certain set of rules, but if–as in most situations–the different parties get excited, mad, sad, insulted, and so on, then persons rules change. That expanded focus forms the basis for Beyond Reason.
Fisher and Shapiro have structured this latest work around five key emotions which they identify as most critical to productive negotiations. Even though each situation has its own dynamics, they point to appreciation, affiliation, autonomy, status, and role as the most vital for building each party comfortable enough to grasp the principles of rationality that maximize the chances for a win-win result.
Critics may deride this book as still too simplistic, too black-and-white, and unappreciative of life’s shades of gray. The authors’ pragmatic bent comes in the book’s final two chapters. One takes readers through the overall process for negotiations–not just the parry-and-thrust of conversations with the additional party, but also pre-conversation preparation. It’s in this preparatory stage, the authors contend, where a thoughtful consideration of potential emotional dynamics can help prevent later problems. To synthesize many of the lessons they impart, Fisher and Shapiro then close their work by inviting guest commentary from the ex- President of Ecuador, Jamil Mahuad, who clarifies how he applied interest-based negotiations theory to highly charged negotiations between his country and Peru, on a border dispute in the late 1990s. It’s this kind of real-life application of Fisher and Shapiro’s theories that continue to give them weight. –Peter Han
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I started reading this book with the hopes of alternative up some fresh thoughts on negotiating. As a lawyer handling divorce and family tree cases, I frequently see a high-level of emotions between parties and I was curious to see if the authors had some insight into how to this might effect negotiations. But, this book was incredibly basic, and I’m not sure who it was written for because all it did was state the obvious. There are better books available on negotiation and this book does not provide anything unique.
Reader’s Rating: 1 / 5
It is excellent especially the chapter about Ecuador vs. Peru war
Reader’s Rating: 4 / 5
Steven Covey calls this book a “masterpiece.” I agree. Before reading the book, I knew that emotions play an vital role in my interactions. But I had not realized the extent to which emotions can help my negotiations. And I had no practical framework to deal effectively with emotions. This book gave me the tools I need.
After reading the book, I now know why people are excited about it. It offers 5 principles (“core concerns”) that help you know people’s emotions and influence them. I was able to easily place the thoughts to practice in some intricate contract negotiations I’ve been involved in these past few weeks. I used the advice especially from the chapters on autonomy and appreciation. The results were impressive. My relationship with the additional negotiators — which have recently been to some extent strained — improved dramatically. The advice of Beyond Reason allowed us to recraft our relationship in a more positive light and made effective together much more effective — and saved me and my company a lot of time and money and grief.
Reader’s Rating: 5 / 5
I read this book right after reading “Starting with NO” by Jim Camp. My key takeaway is the awareness about the core concerns that stimulate emotions during negotiation – Appreciation, Autonomy, Affiliation, Status & Role.
It was hard for me to sustain interest with the book. I felt that there is more theory than real life tales & examples. Anyways, it is worth a quick reading.
Reader’s Rating: 2 / 5
For a fine treatise on effective negotiation, consult BEYOND REASON: USING EMOTIONS AS YOU NEGOTIATE: it maintains that emotions DO matter, especially when negotiating with an mad person in turn, and then shows how to fine-tune these passions into outlets which motivate people. Use his analysis of ‘core concerns’ to know and generate desired, helpful emotions in self and others and know how the emotional tone of the discussion regularly sets negotiation possibilities in a title which clarifies professional responses and how to use emotions to turn conflicts into opportunity.
Reader’s Rating: 4 / 5